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Kathy Martens

Love is better. Pass it on.

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  • Home
  • About
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    • Born Again, Again: A Memoir
    • 101 Ways to Play with Yourself
  • Blog: Love is Better.
  • Pretty Stuff
  • Contact

Permission to Play Podcast

You are here: Home / Permission to Play Podcast

Permission to Play is a podcast for creatives and other humans looking to find their lost mojo (or marbles, as the case may be). Together we explore all things helpful for the care and feeding of the creative soul.

Each month I’ll feature inspiring conversations with interesting and smart people who somehow manage to put their creativity in the world and stay happy and sane doing so.

I chat with writers, actors, filmmakers, plant medicine shamans, nervous system experts and all manner of ordinary, extraordinary people. PLUS occasional solo riffs straight from me to you. Welcome! This podcast is your permission to play.

Listen to episodes below or on your favorite podcast platforms

You can also find the video versions of many of the episodes over on my Permission to Play Podcast YouTube channel.

For show notes and links click the little info icon in the lower right corner of the player.

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Copyright © 2025 · Kathy Martens

Be careful what you pray for. You just might get it.

I lay in the dark. My pounding heart threatens to bash its way through my rib cage. My frantic brain is sending me into a full-fledged panic attack: Eternity with God or a career in film? Eternity with God or fame and wealth? What will I choose? Heaven or Hell? If this goes on much longer, it’s going to crash my hard drive.

“Please God, please.” Hot tears make their way down my cheeks, pool at the base of my throat. “Help me to know if you’re real. Show me if Jesus is the deal and if I’m supposed to follow Him. Please, God . . .”

With the swiftness of a sudden summer breeze, a calming sense of peace washes over me. It descends heavy, from the top of my head, running down my entire body like warm honey. All my poor convulsed muscles relax and melt with it. I weep some more, but this time it feels more akin to joy.

And then, I sleep.

I dream I am a sojourner among a peculiar people who speak in tongues of angels and practice the holy arts of casting out demons and raising the dead. I dream of wheels within wheels, fiery prophets, and a new world order. I wander in this strange Wonderland for what seems a lifetime. One day, I catch a glimpse of my reflection in the glass . . . and I no longer recognize the face gazing back at me.

I wake up, and twenty-two years have passed.

Come, step beyond the looking glass with me and I will show you things. Hilarious and heartbreaking things, bizarre and byzantine things, weird and wonderful things. Like that time I fell down a rabbit hole and spent twenty-two years as a Bible thumping, tongue speaking, Gospel preaching, Born Again Christian. And then I woke up.

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Born Again, Again:

That time I fell down a rabbit hole and spent twenty-two years as a Bible thumping, tongue speaking, Gospel preaching Born Again Christian. And then I woke up.

Born Again, Again Back Cover

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